A Year in Photos-2009

As lots of you know, 2009 was an eventful year for us. I could write about it...but here's a picture slideshow that does our year better justice than my words ever could. Make sure your speakers are turned up! Click on the link below.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Something old, Something New

When Phillip and I got married, we wanted to carry on some old traditions from both sides of our family, like getting dressed up for church on Christmas Eve, the scrapbook (which you've already read about), making treats, and of course, watching Christmas Vacation-the BEST Christmas movie ever made.

But we also wanted to start a new tradition that we could keep doing once we have a family. So, we decided to exchange an ornament on Christmas Eve. This is our fifth married Christmas and our fifth ornament exchange. Here are some pictures of the ornaments we've given to each other in the past. The rule is that the ornament has to have meaning-either something we've experienced together in the last year or something about the other person's personality. I can't tell you what ornament I'm giving Phillip this year...you'll just have to wait and find out. Tomorrow night we'll exchange!

Christmas Scrapbook

In the spirit of blogging about our Christmas traditions, today I'll write about the scrapbook. The Christmas scrapbook is another one of the Kretlow family traditions we decided to carry on. Every year, Bob and Jan would have all the Christmas guests write a little something in a scrapbook. There was always a place to sign in, and usually a question to answer. I love reading what Phillip wrote when he was a kid, especially the entry about his aunt Jacqui setting her socks on fire in the wood stove...

I love this tradition, because it captures more than a picture (although there are some pictures too). So, on our very first married Christmas (2004) I started a scrapbook, wrapped it up and gave it to Phillip as a gift. We've had five years of entries so far! After this year we'll have to buy a new book, because this one is full. I save all kinds of things, like the Christmas Dinner menu (stained with food), the church bulletin from Christmas Eve, and some of the cards family and friends send to us.

This year, we won't be able to travel to NC for the holidays. So, blogaudience (and if you're wondering if this means you, it means everyone!), this time you're required to participate. We want you to "e-write" in the Christmas scrapbook. Send me your answer to the questions and I'll print them out and post them in the scrapbook. You can comment directly on this blog, send an email to akretlow@gmail.com, or post it on facebook. We REALLY want you to write just a little something!

Here are the questions:

1. Sign in and write anything you want!

2. What are you most hoping for in 2010?

Holiday Traditions

I'm going to be blogging about holiday traditions for the next couple of weeks. I have more time to write for fun now, so I'm going to try to blog more.

When you get married, one of the things that is most fun is deciding what traditions you will bring from each family, and selecting some new ones to start as well. I'll be filling you in on the "old" and the "new" traditions in the coming posts.

I'll start with one of the "old" Kretlow traditions-and it involves delicious food! Phillip's mom Jan is the BEST cookie maker in the world. Seriously. Two of Phillip's most favorite cookies she makes at Christmas time are filled date turnovers and butterscotch chocolate rice krispie treats. So, tonight I made the rice krispie treats (I'll make the date cookies tomorrow). I'm giving them as gifts, but also keeping half for Phillip. He'll probably scarf them down in about a day or so. If you know him, you know I am NOT exaggerating!

While these treats are very tasty, they are also symbolic. I remember the first Christmas I spent with the Kretlows. I had already met (and loved) Bob, Jan, and Steven. On the first Christmas, I met Phillip's sister for the first time, who is now such a special friend in my life. Also, I just remember the warmth of spending the holidays with them. They had some crazy traditions, like blessing the Christmas tree with a song, and so on. :) But, it just seemed like the right fit-like I was meant to be a part of it. That was nine years ago this Christmas!

Here is the recipe (and some pictures to illustrate the process). They are really easy (NOT healthy!), and so delicious. And every time I make them, I think of that first Christmas with the Kretlows.

Ingredients

1 C. Light Karo Syrup

1 C. Sugar

1 C. Creamy Peanut Butter

6 C. Rice Krispie Cereal

1 12 oz. package of butterscotch chips

1 12 oz. package of semi-sweet chocolate chips

Bring syrup and sugar to a boil in a non-stick sauce pan. Remove from heat and stir in peanut butter. Stir mixture into rice krispies in a large mixing bowl. Spread rice krispies into a casserole dish. Melt the butterscotch and chocolate chips over a double-boiler (or in the microwave), then spread it over the rice krispies. It will need to sit for a while (or you can refrigerate it) to become solid.

I'm thankful for...

Well, where do I start? I have so many things to be thankful for. When I think about all that transpired between last Thanksgiving and this Thanksgiving...it kind of makes my head spin around on my neck a little! :)

Here are a few things that top the list:

1. Number one on my list is my sweet, handsome, funny husband. That's him getting ready to make his first pumpkin pie (his idea). It's a cheesecake-pumpkin-streussel pie and it is delicious. I snuck a taste while he was making it. I'm sure lots of gals thinks they have the best husband, but I'd line mine up against theirs any day! Phillip is the one, the only, thing that keeps me grounded. He has been my most consistent, faithful friend, and plus, well, he's hot, which doesn't hurt either. :) When we moved to Virginia, we really just started all over again, no money, no house, new jobs. It was HARD. But, knowing that I had Phillip to lean on every day really made it bearable. Phillip made a lot of sacrifices for my dreams, and you better believe I recognize it. He supported us for three years so I could pursue my Ph.D. full time. He agreed to move ANYWHERE that felt "right" to me. He left his job, his friends, and his life without one tiny hint of complaint. Wow. A lifetime of my kindness to him could never live up to that.

2. Second on my list is my family-all of them! As I get older, I realize that no one's family is perfect. (Seriously, I really used to think mine was the only wacky one. I know, I was WAY wrong). So, we're truly a modern family. So what? The most important thing is the love and relationships I have with each individual. That's what I'm thankful for. Oh, and this includes our animals, obviously. :)

3. Third, I'm thankful that we sold our house and we both managed to get jobs. It was truly a MIRACLE that we managed to sell it in such horrible economic conditions. Now, let's not talk about profit...but let's just be grateful we managed to get out!

4. Finally, I'm so thankful the meaningful, important work I get to do every day. I realize that not everyone gets to live out their passion in their job. I LOVE my work. It has been a whirlwind first semester, but when I look around, I see that I'm DOING all the things I wanted to achieve by getting a Ph.D.-like helping LOTS of kids learn to read. Lots of the big dreams I had for myself have come true, thanks to a ton of hard work and some luck along the way.

I've learned a lot since last Thanksgiving, and one of the most important things is that you don't need a lot to be happy. I'm especially grateful for that. Happy Thanksgiving!

Crazy week and visit from the Kretlow Grandparents

This week was a crazy week. You know, sometimes I think it would be better if you received a warning--"heads up-this week is gonna be crazy". Then, at least you could brace yourself for impact! But then again, you might not leave the house and face the world if you knew it was going to be crazy! This is the kind of week where you're running from one thing to the next and you're completely out of everything, including peanut butter.

First of all, I had a couple of weird situations with students...one that is not doing well at all in our program and two others that have some serious problems in their lives. These little situations are the ones you don't receive training on when you're getting a Ph.D. It's really hard when students don't do well in teaching--you want so badly to help them live out their dream of becoming a teacher, but you're also responsible for the students they will impact later on. Tough choices. I mean, there is a shortage of special educators, but are we going for quality or quantity? Anyway, those situations are hopefully handled...for now at least.

Also this week Phillip gave me his nasty little cold. I've had a fever for the last three days...stuffy nose, earache, you get the idea. No, it's not the swine flu (I Googled it). Obviously, Google is the definitive source for all things medical. :)

This week Phillip's grandparents from Colorado also came to town. We haven't seen them since Jennifer's wedding almost five years ago! We went out to dinner with them in Harrisonburg. It was nice to see them, and to see Bob and Jan again. On Thursday Phillip went into DC with them to take grandpa to the Vietnam Wall and the World War Two memorial. Here's a picture of grandpa, Bob, and Phillip. I think they all look alike, and each one is a little taller than the next. So cute! I wonder if we have a little boy if he'll be huge though--because they seem to get taller with each generation! :) He had a great time--I wish I could have gone with him instead of going into work (with a fever) and dealing with a string of struggling students.

I'm really glad it's Friday night and tomorrow I can rest a little! So long for now, back to vegging on the couch with the hubby.

Sweet Husband

I am definitely getting a cold. My throat hurts, my ear hurts, my head hurts, my nose is stopped up. You get the idea. Lots of students are sick (we have a couple confirmed cases of Swing Flu also...scary).

Anyway, when I came home tonight from work, my sweet, sweet husband left a dozen roses on the kitchen table. He knew I wasn't feeling well, and left me flowers. He also picked up a half gallon of milk, because we were out, which I appreciate almost as much as the flowers! What a sweet man. I feel really lucky. I only hope I can be as sweet a wife to him!

Yay, for sweet hubbies.

High School Reunion...10 years, really?

This past weekend I went to my 1o year high school reunion (go Hornets!). It is truly insane how quickly time flies, and how much can change in 10 years. I had an amazing time, and I'm so glad I went!

The best part of the weekend was catching up with girlfriends I haven't seen in too long! When I was in eighth grade, I was lucky enough to meet these girls at Guilford Middle school. My parents had recently gotten divorced and my mom was remarried. New family, new house, new school. It was so overwhelming. I remember being totally embraced by a group of new friends. I have so many good memories of sleepovers, TPing houses, dances, crying over boys (I know, so stupid), and generally trying to figure ourselves out. For me, high school was mostly pretty great (I know, Christina, I said I would block some of it out, which is true!), but the friendships were the part that I wouldn't change for anything in the world.

As we went to college, many of us went our separate ways. We changed--most of us changed alot. We got married, some of had babies, big moves to another part of the country, major illnesses, tragic family events, advanced degrees, and on and on. Getting back together with these amazing ladies this weekend made me so happy. Everyone is so successful, so happy, so accomplished, and in such different and amazing ways. I think we had something special-not everyone has what we had, and I'm grateful for the ways each one of them impacted my life. They taught me a lesson about the importance of friendship, the power of strong women, and the gift of community. Without them, I would be different today.

I only hope that it doesn't take another 10 years for us to all be together again! Love you, girls of WGHS class of 1999!!

Fun Fall Weekend

We had a great weekend! We both agree that this is the best weekend we've had since before I started working on my Ph.D.

First, on Saturday morning we ran the Mosby Canine 5K. There were so many dogs there! The Mosby Foundation (http://www.themosbyfoundation.org) is a non-profit organization that gives money for abused/neglected animals and non-routine veterinarian care. Great cause. Phillip ran with Mollie and they came in a 27.42! He said she pulled him up the hills, and that they would have been first if he could keep up with her pace! I came in at 37 min., which wasn't that great, but was still 1 full minute faster than my last 5K. The course was shaved grass...really different! All the dogs got bandanas and treats at the end. The humans got a really cute T-shirt and an aluminum water bottle.

Also, while we were there they asked for anyone who has grant writing experience to help them. So, of course, I felt the tug at my heart and volunteered to help them write a grant for Petsmart/Petco. Then I find out they don't know anything at all about what they are doing. So, I guess I have my work cut out for me, but it's a good cause. Plus, I need something else to focus on besides work for once.

After the race, Bob and Jan came for a visit. We had the BEST time together. It was so nice to relax and catch up with family. We gave them a tour of the university.

After the university tour, we went to the Dayton Farmer's Market. It's a Mennonite Fair Trade Market. It was amazing! We got spices for a couple of dollars, grits for $.89, and the most delicious vanilla ice cream. Well, I think the ice cream might have tasted better because I ran 3.1 miles a few hours before. :)

Sunday we talked over a long breakfast, then drove around the Crozet area and looked at two homes (open houses). We're not ready to buy, but it was still fun! We really enjoyed spending time with Bob and Jan.

It's so nice to have a life back. I'm determined to keep working on the home/work balance. This weekend was a great start!

Oh, Perfection, you elusive construct.

Perfectionism is a curse. It's such a blessing, and a such a curse. It makes you work harder, which ultimately makes your work better. But it makes you CRAZY because you never think you're good enough. Seriously, who out here can identify with this?

This perfectionism thing...it's what made me get a Ph.D. And now, I continue to torture myself with every decision I make-everything I say in class. Every assignment I choose. Every idea and setback I have with research. Every time I decide to sleep 30 minutes longer rather than running at 6:00 am. Constant self-evaluation. It's sooo frustrating. It's the thing that keeps me awake at night, when my body is so tired, but my mind can't stop. I know I don't know everything-I'm a rookie professor. But it's like I punish myself for not knowing everything on day one! Crazy, right?

On the one hand, I wouldn't trade my perfectionism, because it's the thing that makes me a good teacher. If you're always thinking, "If the learner didn't learn, I didn't teach", you're able to evaluate your instruction, change, and improve the outcomes. I KNOW there are a lot of faculty that don't feel this way.

I'm not that competitive. Okay, so maybe some people would disagree with this:) But really, my idea of competition is to beat MYSELF. I'm always thinking, how can I be better...better at my job, better at my marriage, better at my friendships, better at my family. This is exhausting, but I know it's better than the alternative.

I think perfectionism is one of those personality traits you can never change. Darn it. I just keep telling myself that as long as I'm doing the very best I can for my students, for my husband, for my family, then it's okay. Right?? :)

Date Night

Date nights are my favorite nights in our house. They don't happen often enough. But tonight, we had date night! We tried a new restaurant in Charlottesville=Zo Ca-Lo (picture of the dining room on the left-love the brick accent wall). It's Spanish fusion and it was amazing. I had the key lime free range chicken with black beans, rice and a spicy guacamole-like sauce on top. It was AMAZING. Probably the best chicken I've ever had. Plus, Phillip made a toast to "the most beautiful woman I know". I know, I'm lucky.

After dinner, we went to Whole Foods to pick up a few things...including free-range organic chicken (because our neighborhood grocery doesn't have it), and these little mini-desserts (lemon tart for me, chocolate peanut butter brownie for Phillip). I also got some Cinnamon and Orange essential oil-sounds like a weird combo, but when I had my last massage

(WAY too long ago), the massage therapist told me that combo was supposed to be stress relieving. It's just nice to spend a few hours on the weekend together, sharing a meal, talking, spending time doing nothing. And yeah, I know our whole date night revolved around food-eating it, buying it, and planning to eat it. We're foodies. No apologies here.

Yay for date night.

First Week of Class

The first week of class went by like a blur! It was pretty exciting. I only ever taught one class at a time at UNC Charlotte, so the busyness of teaching three was unexpected. Luckily, I had a lot of materials for Reading Interventions and Classroom Management, so I mostly have to create materials for Survey of Emotional/Behavioral Disorders.

My students are wonderful-smart, thoughtful, inquisitive. One of my undergraduates is already published in a psychology journal! Crazy. ALL of my students in the classroom management course decided to work with a student who has behavior problems instead of writing a paper. Working with the student is a harder project, and they aren't required to do a clinical for this course (which is why I gave them a choice). It says a lot about the students that they all want to work with a student for the project. Every class is unique, because of the different personalities in each one. For example, my classroom management students are SUPER quiet. I will need to rectify that soon. But, my emotional/behavior disorder class is really talkative.

Here's a recap of things I did this week:

1. Dealt with textbook drama (the bookstore ordered the wrong book for one class)

2. Inspired a student to go into School Psychology (What? I have no idea how I did this...but she said I did. Somehow I did this on the first day of class. Further, why didn't I inspire her to go into Special Ed? Hmmm...)

3. Began planning two studies...and worked two full days on an article from my dissertation.

4. Agreed to train teachers in a local school district in October. (How did they already find me, you ask?? I could not answer that question!).

5. Got up at 6:00 every day to run. I can't do it in the afternoon, I'm too tired. I used to be able to exercise in the afternoon when I was a teacher. I can't do it anymore. I think this means I'm getting old. Yep, downward slope to 30.

6. Froze my butt off in my office (it's about 30 below in there). I periodically go into the restroom and run my hands under hot water to defrost them.

7. Slept SUPER HARD every night.

Today, I'm catching up on laundry and not working. Tomorrow, I will have to do some work. We're trying a different church tomorrow morning at 9:00, so that should be interesting as well. Right now, I'm catching up on all the shows I saved on the DVR this week.

First two weeks of University Life

Tonight I am so glad to be sitting on my couch watching reruns. This week has been truly INSANE, but not in a bad way. When I accepted the position at JMU, I was excited and terrified all at the same time. When I was here for the interview, it "felt" right, but in the back of my mind I was afraid I might hate it. I was afraid of hating it because that would mean I uprooted our whole lives for nothing!

Luckily, the gut feeling I had on the interview was more than right. JMU is a fantastic university, and I'm going to be really happy there. Every university has a "culture". Culture is a difficult thing to describe, but I'll try using a few adjectives. Here we go...so far the culture at JMU has been: passionate, extremely collaborative, friendly, hardworking, supportive, "green", quality focused, student focused, research focused, family focused, service focused....and on and on. My colleagues have ALL reached out to support me. I already have research projects planned for the fall...and ideas for the spring. I feel lucky to be at a university that determines tenure based on the "impact" you make in your research and teaching. Not the number of articles, the number of awards, or the number of grant dollars you bring into the university. Nope, they are looking for the impact you make on the community, the student, and the field. Wow, I feel pretty lucky. Plus, I have a brand new MacBook...he he he! :)

The only reason I left the classroom was because I couldn't impact change on a broader scale. I LOVED teaching special education. Now I have the chance to impact so many students' lives through the teachers I will train. I have real, live, students registered for my classes! If you think about the possibility to impact hundreds, thousands of students through the teachers I train, it's a humbling task. It makes me want to work REALLY hard, because I know ultimately I am accountable for this little kids I will probably never meet, and never know. There are school districts already interested in collaborating with me for research, which means even more opportunities to help teachers be more effective and feel more confident in the instruction they provide. I have a lot of responsibility, but I know my skills and desire to change the field of special education are truly a gift.

I realize that not everyone gets to make their passion into their work. I feel extremely lucky. I remember one of the first days in my special education classroom...one of the other teachers told me that eventually I would burn out. Well, she was wrong. WAY wrong. I can only hope the students I teach and the students THEY teach realize the effects of this more than I could ever imagine. Cheers for the first few days of being "Dr. Kretlow" for real.

Virginia is for Lovers

We are finally official Virginia residents! It seemed like this day would never come. On the other hand, when we were saying goodbye to friends, it seemed like it was coming too fast.

Here's what has been going on with us for the last week. On July 31st we picked up the Uhaul (at a VERY random and remote location...) and started packing-just the two of us. It was exhausting. The next morning our "muscle" arrived (i.e., Bob, Steven, & Heath), and they realized the truck was not packed properly and had to shift things around. I left the boys there to repack and clean because the lease had to be signed and keys picked up by 12:00pm. I met my mom and Mary on the road and we went separately to the townhouse. There was no time to say goodbye to our old house, which was probably good. I didn't feel sad, although I really though I would. I guess it really was time to move on.

There was a little drama with the boys...Steve dropped his cell phone...Dad got separated from the caravan...but they finally made it to VA around 7:00pm. Then, it was a quick and dirty move into the townhouse. Only the filing cabinet bit the dust-that's not too bad, considering.

Here are some picks of the move:


We're pretty much all settled in now, thanks to the help of family and friends. Phillip started his job the Monday after the move, while I continued the unpacking for the next week. The truth is, we're really happy here. It doesn't feel like home yet, but it feels like it could become home. Here are some pictures of our temporary home (until we find a house we love). Don't judge...haven't had enough time to get all the curtains up! It's not perfect forever...but it's definitely perfect for where we are right now.

Living Room




Kitchen

Master Bedroom & Bath (With the greatest tub ever!!!)



Guest Bedroom & Bath (For when any of you come to visit...and you better come!)

Our tiny patio

My PANTRY!!! I've wanted one for 5 years. It makes such a difference in cabinet space, and you can see all your choices at once!

Today was my first "official" day of working, although I went in one day last week to get the admin. stuff done. I spent most of the day bringing all my stuff into the office and arranging the furniture. It was quite a workout...and I had already run 2 miles this morning. It was SO hot outside, too. I was the "sweaty professor" instead of the "nutty professor"! As I was working today I just had the most overwhelming feeling that this is EXACTLY where I am supposed to be. Here are some pics of my new office. The pictures don't really do it justice...I actually have quite a bit of space.

The "Before"

The "After"

Here is the sign in front of my door...of course the "Dr." part got caught in the flash. :)

Here are some pictures of the drive to my Charlottesville. Charlottesville is where we want to eventually buy a house. It has a great school system, great restaurants and lots of great shopping. It has tons of character and charm. More pics of Charlottesville to come as we explore. I have no idea why this is coming out underlined...I tried to change it but no luck!

Now for the drumroll...our new address is:

13 Westmorland Ln.
Fishersville, VA 22939
Home phone: 540-221-4227

Call! Write! Come visit! :)